BREAKING ELECTION NEWS: Biola Announces new Campus in Canada “Just in Case”

It appears this year’s election is still pulling out surprises. In an unprecedented move, Biola University has reportedly purchased 500 acres of land just north of Edmonton, Canada, to begin building a new Canadian campus, Biola Edmonton, fully affiliated with Biola’s La Mirada Campus.

“With the enormous success of the Biola Docuseries, it seemed to be the right move,” Biola’s Spencer McCormick, director of the newly formed Ministry of Campus Movement, shared the story with us. “Well, of course the election was a factor, too. We consider this new Canadian campus not only a testament to Biola’s growth, but a sort of fail-safe too… just in case.” McCormick wouldn’t clarify what he meant by saying “just in case,” pointing us instead to the book of Revelation in the Bible.

Students seem to be surprised, but also passively excited by the news.

“Eh,” Canadian Student Brett McKline told us. When asked about the weather differences, Biola’s new Edmonton campus will boast an average temperature of 15 - 35 degrees fahrenheit.

“Students will certainly need to transition from a beach climate to the unpredictable sub-zero tundra”, University Researcher Harrison McFisher told us, “But we will be launching a new line of Biola-licensed sweaters, balaclavas and hand-warmers at the new Biola Bookstore.”

Finally, we asked Biola’s Great North Culture Administrator to comment on new changes we can expect to see at Biola Edmonton.

“The SUB will be renamed 'The Igloo,' Eagle’s Nest will become the 'Moose Den,' and Commons will just be a 'Tim Horton’s.' You can expect a lot of new, positive changes to reflect the fully-frozen, yet exciting Northern Canadian Climate.”

We reached out to DBC for an interview, but he declined to comment as he was in the process of filling out his Canadian Citizenship form.